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Keywords:

• my face is nice and my body is unreal

Comment: © seldom

Description: and my beer pouring/stealing is incredible

Keywords:

• he's the kind of guy

Description: you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway

Keywords:

• national tequila day falls on a monday

Description: i've never been more disappointed in my life

Keywords:

• you're a disaster

Comment: the rest © awkward

Description: wanna date?

Keywords:

• let the decider decide

Keywords:

• had to leave abruptly through window

Description: will explain later.

Keywords:

• what. the. fuck.

Description: You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff

Keywords:

• trash (remastered)

Keywords:

• just nut up and die alone

Keywords:

• just dropped a new single

Description: it's me... i'm single.

Keywords:

• he threatened my life and my car

Description: because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him?

Keywords:

• like i’ve seen him completely trashed

Description: and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not

Keywords:

• my manager caught me taking a nap

Description: in an empty room. apparently, she sleeps there too.

Keywords:

• had a vaginal orgasm

Description: I feel like I made sex my bitch

Keywords:

• i'm shrooming way too hard to deal w/

Comment: © recondites

Description: your bullshit at this particular point in time